The Messengers Touch - The Open Door

The Messengers Touch – The Open Door

While walking from my friends and their celebration of my return I was approached by a messenger. He looked just like anyone else but when he began to speak I knew inwardly who he was. The messenger asked if I would like to tell others of my sojourn and I said I would. He told me he had access to the record of all activity in Home including all of my experiences in the Anomaly. The messenger said if I wish he could bring anything to my awareness he found helpful. He asked if I wished to recall my experiences in the Anomaly, and I said I did.

The Anomaly, I have found, is not a single state but one that gradually increases in density.  I find it helpful to visualize this as layers progressing from fine to dense. Consequently, form in the Anomaly becomes gradually denser. Experience in the Anomaly has taught me not all of me is of the same density. My mind, for example is of much finer substance than my body as are the electrical impulses that travel along my nervous system. So I exist in the Anomaly on several levels. Even in matter, there is energy, gaseous and solid, all existing simultaneously and often interchanging.

Previously I mentioned my experiential self and my motivational self. I would like to emphasize that my motivational self is the me that exists in Home, the me that entered the Anomaly and the me that will return to Home following my visit. Its form is comprised of the substance of Home. My experiential self exists completely in the Anomaly and consists of the finer substance of the Anomaly. My motivational self exists first immediately adjacent to my experiential self and through a process similar to absorption functions through my experiential self. This union of both parts of me I call my mind.

Consciousness in the Anomaly is a state of awareness. It is real, containing form permeating the first stage or finest form of the Anomaly. I would not be far afield if I said the first stage of the Anomaly is comprised almost entirely of consciousness. What we in the Anomaly conceive as motivation, values, desires and fears all exist in consciousness. Likewise the result of all experiences in the Anomaly exists in consciousness and although the circumstances may have long ago dissipated the living record of them continues to exist here in full force. Nothing is lost no act, no thought, no emotion; they all live on as long as consciousness does. Those guiding forces I call patterns permeate consciousness from Home drawing form both mental and physical form into conformity with them.

Love and indifference are the primary motivating forces in the Anomaly and it surprised me how often I moved from one state to the other never realizing the change taking place. The first or primal expression of each to imbue consciousness in the Anomaly is faith and fear. There is as much faith as there is fear in the Anomaly and neither can be completely avoided. Here is where choice plays an important role to determine how often we will swing from one state to the other and the length of time we will spend in each. Although at the bottom of the pit of consciousness, fear, I have found is a useful tool in the struggle for the intense focus available in the Anomaly. However we often let this tool we call fear to rule our lives.

I suppose one of the greatest benefits to be found in fear is that it allows us a place to step aside and inspect the fullness of faith from what seems like an outside perspective. Also, we grow first from our choices and then by expressing them. I find without the possibility of fear how could we continue to choose faith. If we faced no alternative of what benefit would our choice be to us. Each time we choose faith we have the opportunity for immeasurable growth through expressing it in our affairs. Because all things are transient in the Anomaly if we choose faith only once and for all it will eventually lose its vibrancy.  Each time we choose we add a special energy to our consciousness that we utilize when we finally express these choices. However, the energy once used must be renewed by continuously choosing. In this way we grow choice by choice.

Because of their primacy there is no escaping faith and fear in the Anomaly. What I did not before consider is if we are not expressing faith we are expressing fear. There appears no middle ground and if we do not choose faith then fear becomes our default condition. It appears to me that we have a well that is constantly being filled and if we do not fill it with faith, fear will naturally flow in. In the Anomaly we discuss the many kinds of fear but there is only one kind. All the rest categorize how we express fear. There are so many categories of how we express fear in the Anomaly I could list dozens of them. Faith connects us with our source and builds within us those living patterns for perfection. The energy of which faith is comprised pulls us in to conformity with those patterns. Fear, simply put, is the absence of faith.   

Life, I have found, is infinite and there is no lack of anything but fear leads us to the opposite conclusion. I have experienced the very first stage of fear in the Anomaly which is a feeling of separation. This is the result of the isolation felt by the loss of faith. Separation leads to feelings of lack which are expressed as lack of love, lack of supply, lack of friendship and lack of opportunity. Also, feelings of lack sponsor destructive behavior such as worry, greed, pride and dishonesty in all forms.

Our children are born without the ability to consciously choose between faith and fear. Although they are filled with equal amounts of each, they do not yet know how to activate one or the other. Faith being dominant will of consequence rule the child. I find early on, because we have come to believe fear is a good learning tool, we awaken it in our children even in their infancy. Through repetition we become habitually fearful and fear dependent. It has been my experience in the Anomaly that we are vibrant growing sentient life forms destined to be much more than victims of circumstance. Infinite mercy would mean very little if we could not make a miracle out of our greatest fears. The presence of fear in our lives has within it the promise of perfection through transformation.

We cannot reverse the cycle of fear by combating those things that make us afraid. Fearful as conditions may appear to be they are simply triggers that excite the fear already within us. If we wish to change we must deal with the fear itself and not only what awakened it. Although there are many expressions of fear there is only one way to combat it. The presence of faith will drive out fear and give it no place to take hold. Each time we choose faith we are filled with the energy necessary to express it, and with each expression we drive out fear from our lives. However, as I previously mentioned, in the Anomaly this energy dissipates and we must renew our acts of faith continuously. It has been my experience we can choose to or choose not to confront those things that make us afraid, but to change we must act in faith driving out those fundamental forces that make us afraid.  However, I cannot overestimate the value of meeting those conditions that excite fear in the Anomaly. Each time we confront those things that have awakened fear within us we have the opportunity to experience extraordinary acts of courage. As a result we build character and leave an indelible mark on our motivational self that lives on long after the act itself.

Feelings of separation are the sponsor of all other fears and haunt all of us in the Anomaly to one degree or the other. Fear of death, rises directly from our fear of separation and influences all of us living in the Anomaly. How we live our lives on a daily basis is influenced greatly by our attitude toward death. Life in the Anomaly is cyclical and all livings thing die.  The Anomaly exists for the benefit of our experience and not for our permanent residence. Yet, once so embodied we become so fixated on form we often dread our eventual release of it.

Death as I understand it is a transition, the same as is birth. Each is a doorway with one leading in and the other leading out.  We did not come into existence upon birth and we certainly do not cease to exist after we die. We make much preparation before stepping in to the Anomaly and the same amount before we step out. However, we are largely unaware in the Anomaly of our preparation to depart because it is conducted by our motivational self. At some point after the middle of our experience in the Anomaly, it varies with individuals, we begin to release out grip on form. We do this slowly, carefully and methodically until our experiential self is no longer fixed on form. Our experiential self is aware of something happening but has no idea what it is. Many of us gradually lose interest in things, grow closer to others and believe it is the result of a matured perspective. Maturing is a factor but in later life the experience is largely to assist our transition. We could not resume a healthy life in Home if we were still fixed on the Anomaly without the means to express those passions. For it is from Home we come, to Home we return and Home we are made of. As we prepare, ever so gradually we change internally until we take that small step to release our hold on form. If our experiential transient self were aware of these preparations fear would most likely make them exceedingly difficult.

It may appear we leave unexpectedly but that simply does not happen. No matter the circumstances surrounding our departure, our motivational self will be neither surprised nor unprepared.  We can keep no secrets from our motivational self and this part of us deals exceedingly well with potential. We witness all of the causes in our life, direct and indirect, and we can easily determine the results. For whether we are prepared to accept it or not our use of cause and effect has determined the course of future.

I have learned there are those times when our experiential self chooses to dominate and refuses direction from our mental self. When this occurs, resulting in death such as our prematurely terminating our life without sufficient preparation, our transition can become far more traumatic than necessary. However, I am certain we will eventually adjust.  The law of mercy is present always in the Anomaly to insure that no experience is more than we can handle at any given time. We may choose to ignore mercy and cut short any experience we wish. After our adjustment and recovery we are free to return to the Anomaly at any time to complete any unfinished business. I do not want to understate the difficulty experienced when our transition is made without sufficient preparation but I also do not wish to imply we will not fully recover from such a choice. I have complete faith in infinite mercy and in all eternity I have never met anyone that did not eventually adjust after returning to Home.

This final step is so small yet from an Anomaly perspective it is so large. We release our grip on form, stepping out and we are once again alive and aware in the splendor of Home. At first it is like waking up from a foggy dream being absolutely amazed by the clarity of all we behold. The feeling of freedom is indescribable while the sounds are musical, the sights are beautiful and our surroundings majestic. The fears are gone as are the limits of time and space. I can recall all of this vividly because of the Messenger’s touch but it is not common to most of us that return from a visit to the Anomaly. For those of us that may have been touched by the Messenger we can remember our experiences with a clarity never before experienced in the Anomaly.  However, we soon consign them to a dim memory because they no longer serve us well. The reason for visiting the Anomaly is to better understand our individuality so we can have a greater appreciation of our uniqueness even as we are one with all things. Once we grow there is no reason to retain these things in the forepart of our consciousness. In Anomaly terms, it would be similar to learning how to drive an automobile, once we are proficient and we have become excellent drivers it is no longer necessary to recall the individual driving lessons. Once we have internalized the uniqueness of our individuality it is no longer necessary to retain in the front of our memory the conditions that enabled this.

The joy of returning to Home is so overwhelming it is almost impossible to reconcile with the debilitating fear of death I experienced in the Anomaly. The final step out was so small and the change so large it is difficult to measure the difference in size. Yet, I am at Home and no matter how many times I venture out, no matter where my adventures take me, I will still return to its eternal embrace.

The Messenger touched my upper lip with his finger, right beneath my nose, ever so gently and suddenly I relived with incredible clarity every single thing I experienced in the Anomaly. Not only was it clearer to me now than it was then but I can remember each and every emotion I experienced. Just then the messenger vanished and I have not seen him since.

Habits That Help

We are human beings with minds formed of habit. We learn largely through repetition and use critical thinking to express our self in wholly original ways. However, our emotional self, that part of us that motivates our activities, is almost fully dependent on habit. Also, the part of our self that uses reason is moderately to completely influenced by habit. If we fail to recognize this in our self we can simply observe how this works in our children.

A normal body must rely heavily upon habit to fully function. Likewise, we must rely on habit to deal with those events that require an instant response. Habit is so large a part of what we are that who we are could never develop without it. Reliance on habit is not our weakness it is instead an instrument of our humanness. We could… we should work at building constructive habits because positive or negative they will dominate our life. If we acknowledge the fact we are so heavily influenced by our habits the challenge becomes to transform them in to helpful ones.

Those instances where our life is changed by a single event are very few indeed. Often a repetition of events is necessary to form new habits. An inspiration may motivate us to change but rarely is its magic sufficiently powerful to endure the seemingly endless assaults of habit. Most often our desire to change will collapse under the crushing weight of repetitive challenges. So what are we who wish to change to do?

It would doubtless be helpful to find living examples to inspire us. For only such examples are enduring for as long as it takes us to form new habits. No seeking heart is so isolated that examples are not readily available to them. It takes only willingness, a willingness to change and a willingness to seek out examples. Then when old habits rise up to protest our neglect of them, inspiration by example will once again allow us to take the next step in transforming our life. We most often grow in stages and living examples will help us in our gradual ascent.

The largest changes in us may come about when we choose to become an example, an inspiration to others. To so live that we draw others to us and become a means of their transformation. This is not as easy as it may sound because it takes a lifetime of dedication and a willingness to pay the price that others will be transformed by our life. We are not required to be perfect but to be dedicated in our pursuit of excellence. We may not see the results but a dedication to our mission will see us through. Then we may understand the greatest miracle we can perform is to make a miracle of someone else.

The Messengers Touch: Inside Out

The Messengers Touch: Inside Out

While walking from my friends and their celebration of my return I was approached by a messenger. He looked just like anyone else but when he began to speak I knew inwardly who he was. The messenger asked if I would like to tell others of my sojourn and I said I would. He told me he had access to the record of all activity in Home including all of my experiences in the Anomaly. The messenger said if I wish he could bring anything to my awareness he found helpful. He asked if I wished to recall my experiences in the Anomaly, and I said I did.

I was totally surprised when in the Anomaly it was suggested by one of my friends that reality was internal and not external as it appeared to be. This contradicted everything my experiential self had learned. However, because my motivational self knew this to be true I found the concept appealing. In Home we take for granted that all reality is experienced inwardly, while in the Anomaly the reverse is true. My experience has taught me that the illusion of separateness in the Anomaly is what makes possible the concept of an outside focus possible. Only after I became accustomed to the separateness of things in the Anomaly did I begin to understand the connectedness of internal and external reality. For example, it was like plucking a thought from my head, holding it out in front of me to inspect it from all sides and then with this new insight returning it from where it came.

In the Anomaly it was quite natural to set aside my experiential mind at regular intervals to give my motivational mind an unhindered opportunity to revitalize my body. This process is called sleep and it is how I shut down my experiential mind. The amount of it we require each day varies with need. Additionally, the confinement of time and space is shocking to my motivational mind and it needs to make many adjustments that are best done when my experiential mind is at rest. During this renewal or rest period my motivational mind operates without any interference from my experiential mind. The process is entirely internal. Although my experiential mind does not participate in this activity it does observe it. When I awaken from my rest my experiential mind recalls some of what took place. However it does not have the ability to comprehend what it witnessed so it creates a symbolic story around the events. These symbols are drawn largely from my experiential mind’s waking experiences. We call this symbolic recall a dream.

The dream state occurs when my experiential self reaches the proper state of rest. At these times I observe the activity and even converse with my motivational self. Although my motivational self is fully active throughout my sleep, only at those times of deep relaxation or what we call the dream state does my experiential self process what it observes. During sleep my motivational self processes the experiences my experiential self has taken it through in my waking state. As a result so many of my dreams seem to be addressing events that took place the day before even though the symbols I use are from experiences throughout my life in the Anomaly. Based on how my motivational self feels about my activity I have either a pleasant or unpleasant dream. I have found ways to interpret my dreams; that is to decipher the symbols, resulting in a real collaboration between my motivational self and my experiential self. Second to understanding the language spoken in my native residence in the Anomaly, understanding my dream language is the most valuable.

My motivational or mental self often disengages during sleep and leaves the confines of Anomaly. Because of the overwhelming feeling of confinement my mental self experiences in the Anomaly these sleep state journeys are incredibly invigorating. When my mental self experiences these periods of release my experiential self awakens with a heightened feeling of wellbeing. It is during these journeys my mental self is invigorated, it renews the life force it expended maintaining my physical body and upon awakening I feel an increase in energy.

In my dream state my experiential mind experiences the sensations that are aroused by the symbols. The process is internal and seems quite natural. Everything in the dream seems quite real. Because the process is inward it is clearer and more vibrant than what I view when fully awake. For the rest of my experience in the Anomaly there is the sway back and forth. When asleep I readily accept this inward focus, the world of the mind as reality and when I awake I consign the experience having been a fantasy. Yet my motivational mind never thinks my external focus is without merit while my experiential mind takes the opposite approach. Here is where I began to reason the possibility that inward focus may indeed be a valid approach.

The illusion of reality being fully outside could not be maintained in the Anomaly in all things. To exercise my sense of smell I had to internalize the molecules of matter. The same was true of my sense of taste; it must take place internally. As for my sense of sight, I had to allow the image to enter myself through my eyes and travel through my nerves before I could perceive an image. I could not exercise my sense of hearing until I allowed vibrations to enter me and register in my brain. Finally I could exercise my sense of touch only once I allowed the sensations to enter me through my nervous system and travel along my central nervous system. What I found was whatever I perceived as outside of me must be internalized before I could actually experience it.

Once I began to question the relationship of my internal experiences to my external ones did I begin to fully value each. I was still able to relate to everything around me as being separate from me but I could then gradually appreciate the internal connectedness of all things. In this way I could focus intensely on some things at the exclusion of others, while at the same time I could gain an appreciation for the connectedness of everything. It was a delightful surprise to me when I discovered in the anomaly that although reality is really inward I can fix my attention upon my experiences as though they were external. From this I have learned what appears to be external in the Anomaly is very real but it is projected by me to supply the clarity that comes from isolating the images.

There are ways in the Anomaly to recall certain experiences stored in my mental self as well as dialogue between my experiential and motivational self. The process is also invigorating because it allows an increased flow of the renewing life force stored in my motivational self to pour out upon my experiential self. We call this process meditation and it is a quieting process where my experiential mind can be stilled sufficiently to allow my motivational mind the untrammeled freedom it enjoys only in deep sleep. As a result my experiential mind is only stilled and not at complete rest. In this way it can observe and in most cases recall the entire experience. My meditation has become a bridge over which the unseen primal forces of my mind travel between my motivational and experiential selves. Like a physical sense the more it is used the sharper my meditation becomes.

My plans were formulated and set in my motivational self before I stepped into the Anomaly; though the directions and promptings come from this primal eternal self, the final decisions are the purview of my experiential self. We call this freedom of choice and it is inviolate. Although my experiential self can make whatever final decisions it deems appropriate, it is the responsibility of my mental self to use each of them for my eternal benefit. My experiential self enjoys unfettered freedom of choice in the Anomaly just as my motivational self has been bestowed with inviolate freedom of choice in Home.

While in the Anomaly I have become accustomed to borders. That is to say I have become comfortable with time and space. Time being the progression of events and space the separation. This affords boundaries to everything so that events appear isolated. In this way I can inspect everything without the distraction of anything else. Like so much in the Anomaly separateness is a blessed illusion. In Home, which the Anomaly is a projection of, there are no borders, no boundaries and no separations. Everything penetrates everything else and this is quite a natural connection. In the Anomaly we call such an existence oneness but our experiential mind, born in and constituted of time and space cannot really conceive of oneness. Yet in the Anomaly we experience oneness on a daily basis. I have observed when I look at something, listen to it, smell, taste, and touch it all at the same time one sense does not inhibit the other but enhances it. When I use all of my senses together not only is the acuity of each improved but my overall perception is increased immeasurably. By comparison, when we truly experience oneness the events that merge together do not distract from one another but likewise add to our perception. In my deep meditation and sleep state I have experienced a simultaneous awareness of many things and my consciousness of each is enhanced by my concurrent awareness of the others.

I often become confounded in the Anomaly and think that using my senses together will add to the confusion I sometime experience. This I have found occurs most frequently because repetition has formed habits and habits have given rise to expectation. In this way I may expect something bright to be loud or to feel smooth when it shines but this and similar errors are simply the result of expectations born of habit.

In the Anomaly I find myself subject to separation and borders but knowing about oneness, observing where it penetrates my day to day experiences gives me a greater appreciation of both separateness and oneness.

I have found everything in the Anomaly consists of energy vibrating at different rates. As a result manifest materiality varies in density. I simply accept without question air is not as dense as water nor is water as dense as stone. However I have found there are states of matter that are even more sublime than gases that simply consists of energy vibrating at a much higher rate. I do not know from my experience how much more there is of this sublime matter than the denser form, to which I have become accustomed, but I conjecture there must be much more. I have experienced this finer expression of time and space, it is as real and as the denser form, and at this point all states of matter penetrate one another.

For many of us the vale that separates perception of the finer forms of matter form the denser ones is very thin indeed. There is constant movement between the finer and denser manifestations but for some of us one or the other in more permanent. When I first stepped in to the Anomaly I passed through this finer region and I did so again when I stepped out. In my meditations and my deep sleep my motivational self frequently enters the finer expression of the Anomaly. My experiential self does not recall in great detail these experiences because it is conditioned to the denser states. However, through meditation and the dialogue that is possible between my mental self and my experiential self in this and my dream state I have learned a great deal more about this finer state. To my initial surprise I learned that I pass through this finer state during natural sleep on a daily basis.

Although my perspective is not as intense in the finer states my ability to influence the formation matter is much keener. Because matter is in the initial state of densification here in the finer region it is more malleable and subject to manipulation by my motivational self. I have discovered it is from here the unseen laws pour out upon the Anomaly to guide day to day life.

I have seen how in the dream state thoughts become things. The entire process and everything I encounter in the dream is comprised of thought. During this experience it never occurs to me that the experience is not real and it is not until I awaken and reinvest my attention in the three dimensional expression of the Anomaly do I begin to question the reality I experienced in the dream state. Yet to my mental self, the dream author and entire cast, this is as real as anything else in the Anomaly. In the finer states my thoughts do take form even though I may be in the denser state when they occur. What makes this possible as long as I am in the Anomaly is that my mental self is always connected to the finer regions.

I scarcely believed the influence my thoughts and moods had upon life in the finer regions. My unintended creations I call my thought forms loomed larger than life at me peering out the window between the two realities. This was very helpful in alerting me of the danger of holding negative emotions. These thought forms would eventually influence forming matter in the anomaly and have an effect on my daily affairs.

Often I consider the location of the mind, experiential as well as motivational. I have found it exists fully in the finer realms and because the finer completely penetrates the denser, it is always accessible to me. Because the focus is inward, all reality, including my mind is truly within me.

Through time fear of the unknown gave rise to many superstitions. Many of them were regarding the finer regions but we have been moving slowly away from this. My friends and family in the Anomaly have been more willing to set their fear of the unknown aside to become more comfortable with this finer expression of material reality.  

Many scientists studying the behavior of what they can detect with their senses suggest that there are more than simply three dimensions. Most recently some have postulated there may be at least 10. Those beyond 3 my well exist in the finer expressions of matter and in time we may be able to interact with them as we do radio waves, electricity and other of the unseen energies.

What a fascinating journey this is.

The Messenger touched my upper lip with his finger, right beneath my nose, ever so gently and suddenly I relived with incredible clarity every single thing I experienced in the Anomaly. Not only was it clearer to me now than it was then but I can remember each and every emotion I experienced. Just then the messenger vanished and I have not seen him since.

Forgiveness

We are often held prisoner by our own attitudes and we go on punishing our self unnecessarily. It may not be possible for us to change the circumstances in our life but we can indeed change the way we respond to them. The difficulty lies in our trying to change conditions when what is really necessary is a change in attitude. The conditions we meet were set in motion long before we had the chance to experience them. We did this in order to have the opportunity to meet our self in new and original ways.

We have been helped and hindered, lauded and maligned. We have been the object of affection and hatred, the victor and the victim. Throughout these experiences we have striven to hold on to those experiences we found pleasant and escape those we found disagreeable. Try as we would, we may have found we could not change the difficult experiences and endurance was the only solution. However, endurance alone may well leave us resentful, fearful and distrustful, causing us to set in motion a whole new set of experiences to meet in our future.

Resentfulness is disempowering, draining us of the vitality that comes from hope and joy. It is a prison of our own making and one we need not endure. When we are wronged, feeling resentful is simply punishing the victim. At such times we can deal with the problem or absorb it. Absorption of the perceived wrong will almost surely lead to resentment as will trying to overpower the event. But we are not defenseless and we need not be the victim. How then do we constructively deal the pain resulting from ill treatment?

Forgiveness is the magic potion that will make a medicine of the poison. It is the most transforming life changing response we can experience. Instead of dealing with the conditions that left us wounded, through forgiveness we transform our self from victim to victor. The conditions then are changed from stumbling blocks to become stepping stones upon which we climb ever higher. Forgiveness has less to do with others than it does to our self. It is we who are changed by it and we who are set free from the cycle of fear and resentment. At the same time we may well awaken something better in the very ones that wounded us.

Love seeks to love and never to get even. Forgiveness seeks to be kind, to be gentle and requires nothing in return. Forgiveness never requires reasons, sets conditions or expects the response of others. It is a single act of grace that pours out from us upon others. With forgiveness events are not driven off but transformed in to blessings. With forgiveness we absorb blessings not maltreatment. With forgiveness we light up the world around us so that others may see more clearly in the dimly lit world around them.

May God bless you and may His tender loving kindness fill you to overflowing.